n America, there’s a burglary every eleven seconds … ” Other, more heinous crimes occur at a startlingly high rate as well, as rattled off by Marion Cobretti (Sylvester Stallone), who clearly seems to suggest that vigilante tactics are the only way to manage rampant terror on the streets of California. Sure enough, a black-garbed, shotgun-toting maniac strolls into a supermarket and begins shooting up the place, killing innocent people as the police gather outside, uncertain how to negotiate.

“Call the Cobra.” Pulling up in a classic car with the license plate AWSOM 50, Lieutenant Cobretti soon infiltrates the building, much to the chagrin of by-the-books lead detective Monte (Andrew Robinson), who disapproves of the reckless enforcer. In no time at all, however, Cobretti contains the situation, expending a few bullets and an even greater number of snappy epithets. “I’ll blow this whole place up!” “Go ahead. I don’t shop here.”

“Did you use unnecessary deadly force?” As a serial killer dubbed the Night Slasher (Brian Thompson, forever cast in these types of roles) continues his terrorization across the city (the Los Angeles area), murdering people with knives, hammers, and axes (his body count is up to 16 mutilated corpses before the police realize they’re outmatched), it would seem that playing by the rules isn’t going to help the cops nab the bad guys. It’s going to be up to an unaccountable, destructive, uncontrollable officer to get the job done, without the oversight of Internal Affairs or direct sanctioning by the higher-ups.

Spouting nonstop, macho one-liners while unflinchingly dispatching villains (and wearing sunglasses indoors), Sly Stallone doesn’t have to stray too far from his typical tough-guy persona to embody the hero here. And he’s joined by a statuesque model for a love interest – Brigitte Nielsen as damsel-witness-in-distress Ingrid Knudsen. Curiously, the premise is quite similar to “Dirty Harry,” with a Zodiac-like monster tormenting the authorities (sans the cyphers), with the added oddness of casting Andrew Robinson as well as Reni Santoni in supporting roles. The film is even simpler, however, having the Night Slasher become a Terminator-like nemesis who stalks his prey as Cobretti demolishes the scenery in his attempts to thwart the madman; it’s a one-note actioner, unable to conceal a remarkably flimsy plot designed entirely for testosterone-fueled confrontations.

Fortunately, a few stunts are rather impressive – including a car chase (with typical, unlikely explosions) and bodies dramatically falling from considerable heights – while director George P. Cosmatos shoots many sequences like an updated, slicker “Halloween” thriller; the presentation of much of the violence is enough to border on horror (aided by the unsettling, dissonant plucking of violin strings). Plus, one or two mildly amusing mystery tropes lightly complicate the scenario, ultimately pitting an army of psychopaths and constant disapproval from police superiors against the lone wolf. Sadly, there’s very little of “Cobra” that’s original, from its dated soundtrack to its cardboard characters (the protagonists and antagonists alike are notably straightforward and lacking nuance, with the villains having particularly unclear motives; even romantic patter comes across as trite). At least the picture builds to a rip-roaring showdown like something out of a high-powered, bullet-laden, casualty-strewn neo-Western – with motorcycles instead of horses and machine guns instead of revolvers.

– Mike Massie